we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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