It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
