are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
My vagina just recognized that song.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
