I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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