oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
