My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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