And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
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