Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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