Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
