I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize