There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
