Just cropdusted the office
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Dicks are not precious.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
