At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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