I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
being pregnant is like rehab
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
