she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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