I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
