so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
You can't motorboat a personality
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Randomize
