Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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