? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Randomize
