I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
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