Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
