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He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
this beer tastes like vomit already
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
