ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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