Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Randomize