Define "chronic" masturbator.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I am available for nakedness
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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