When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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