You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
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