Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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