you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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