alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize