i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
