She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
What changed your mind?
Being sober
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
