i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
