But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
