i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
