I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
