If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
