so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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