It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
