you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
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