hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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