i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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