True but thats because hes a fetus.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
If I die, sorry about rent.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
