Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
