Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
look no pants
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
