Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
