it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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