Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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