The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
