I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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